Can't cry want to Cry
by meme12
Summary: After a run-in with Talia, Damian wakes up withdrawn, stops talking and lacks the will to live or respond to anything. The Bat family finds out about Damian's scars and his journal describing his training, insecurities, bullying and misunderstandings at play that shape Damian's character. Can the Bat family help Damian heal or is it too late for Damian. OOC Damian.
1. Can't Cry want to Cry

**Can't Cry, Want to Cry**

Summary: After a battle with Ra's which landed Damian with serious injuries; Damian wakes up withdrawn, stops talking and lacks the will to live or respond to anything. The Bats also discover scars and Damian's journal that shows the training, insecurities, bullying and misunderstandings at play that make Damian act the following way and eventually leading to his withdrawn state. Can the Bat family make Damian open up once more or was it already too late for the broken child?

OOC moments: Damian will be OOC since he's suffering from a mental break down.

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman and their characters.

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Normal POV

The back door of the Wayne Manor opens quietly. The small figure quint through the darkness before he limps in. Shutting the door quietly, the child quickly made a beeline to the kitchen. Fighting the pain, the child fumbles through the cupboards and quietly sighs in relief at finding the first aid kit at one try. Trembling hands fumbles with the first aid kit and the child immediately makes a make-shift splint and sling for his broken arm along with bandaging the gash on his head. Stealthily, he snuck out of the kitchen and immediately dash up to his room. Shutting the room door behind him, Damian crawled into the cupboard and closed the door.

Curling up against the blankets and the clothes, Damian couldn't help but feel safe. He felt that it was laughable, the great assassin's main safety zone was to hide in a cupboard like a child… He couldn't help but smile wryly, true he is a child… A 7 year old bred and engineered to be a heartless killer on the path to destruction no doubt. Then… his father took him in, he met his brothers and his whole world was flipped upside down when he realised that everything he was taught was wrong and he had to re-learn everything all over again. But no matter how hard he had tried, no one could see the changes and his sharp tongue never helped at all. Sighing, the young robin couldn't help but recall the rude awakening he had experienced earlier.

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Flashback

"Robin watch- Argh!" "Red Robin!" Robin aka Damian watches as the ninja knocks out Red Robin before proceeding to attack Nightwing. "No!" The child cries out as he rushes to fight off the ninjas that were attacking his brothers. "Don't even try." Damian froze at the voice as he turns to face the one woman that had taught him everything. "Mother!" Talia smirks as she leaps down from her perch and strolls towards her son. "Don't stop them child. They are no longer needed… They have raised you so well…" Robin steps away from the woman who frowns at the action. "What is wrong my child?" "I should be the one asking mother. What are you doing to my brothers?" Damian hissed and Talia stared at him raising a brow. "I'm just getting rid of the dead weights so that I can bring you home Damian. Isn't that obvious?" The young boy's eyes widen at the sentence. "But…you told me I could stay with father…" "I didn't say forever little one. Besides, I left you there because I needed you to be under their tutoring, learn their secrets, get stronger and then…rip them apart!"

Damian said nothing at that point and Talia continues. "Now that you are stronger, you are ready to come back to me and together we can lead the League of Shadows to their greatest heights. All that's left now…is to remove the dead weights…" "No." Talia raised a brow as Damian's hand fisted and the young child looked up at her. "I'm not leaving them mother." "If it is because they were your teachers then I suggest you start re-learning what I had taught you prior to throw away the gratitude you have for them…" It's not that! They are my family! They…gave me everything that I couldn't have from you." "Pray tell me what it is." Talia questioned icily as the 8 year old stares at her. "They…taught me what is the actual right from wrong and they gave me the love and affection that I could never get from you."

At that moment, Talia started laughing at the comment. Her laughter sent chills running down his spine. "Love? Affection? Don't make me laugh! Those emotions are useless for an assassin and besides…do you think that they can truly love you for what you are?" Robin felt a harsh chill at those words but ignores the feeling as Talia resumes her speech. "I gave you a mission Damian and you have utterly failed. Instead of telling me the secrets of the bats you have instead been weakened by their petty lies and becoming nothing more than their puppets. I am extremely ashamed by you…you have even failed to be even a single help to me or your grandfather." The words cut deeply into Damian but he pulled on his poker face and steadied himself. "If I had failed you so be it. Leave my family alone!"

Talia barked out another round of laughter again. "Then try it child!" The two exchanged blows and Damian ignored the stinging pain that came with the blows that he had missed. Eventually Talia had managed to knock him off his feet and pin him down. Damian cried out as his mother stomped on his arm. "Foolish boy, do you even think that you could defeat me?" Damian tried to move but he grunted as Talia's stomped on his wrist harder. "The answer is no since you have grown weak with those lies that they gave you…" The woman forces the child to look at her. "You say that they love you but how do you know that they do? They probably have more suspicion about you then they can love you. A false picture that they paint so that you will let your guard down and be willingly used by them!" Damian glared back defiantly and Talia smirked. "I'm sure on the front they act loving but stab you behind the back don't they? Whispering their hate and wearing their masks…"

Damian wanted to scream out in anger and sadness as Talia's words hit their mark but he did not want to give his mother the satisfaction as Talia continued. "Oh my dear stupid child…they would never ever love a violent blood thirsty assassin like you even if you don their costume and listen to them!" The grip on his arm tightens even more and Damian was grateful for the pain as it blocked out the sting of the truth in those words. "This is the truth Damian, they have never and will never see that you are one of them. So, stop being silly and come back with me…to your real home." Damian remained silent and for a moment Talia thought she had gotten through to him but Damian just laughed. "Over my dead body." A flash of anger when through Talia's eyes and a loud snap was audible as she broke Damian's arm before kicking the child aside. You straightens and stares at Damian like he was nothing but dirt. "I see, you are too corrupted to be saved… From now on, you are no longer part of the Al Gul household… You are no longer my son." "So be it." Damian spat and Talia smirks at him. "Which means…I get to finish off your 'family'."

Damian's eyes have widened in realisation behind his mask as he hears a cry. He looks to see Nightwing being knocked down and the ninja raising his sword prepared to end both Nightwing and Red Robin's life. "No!" Damian screamed as he sprinted to stop the ninja from bringing down the sword on his brothers while Talia's laugh rang in his ears. It was at that moment that a black shadow lands before the ninja and knocks away the weapon and the ninjas while blocking his siblings from harm. Batman knocked out the ninja before proceeding to check on his siblings and Damian looked around realising that his mother had long left; probably recognising that the mission will end with a failure with the Dark Knight's arrival. Damian watches as his father knelt over to check the unconscious heroes and he could tell that behind the mask the older male was extremely worried about his wards. Damian felt his heart clenched when the gaze hardened when they landed on him. Robin looked at the Dark Knight pleadingly, hoping that his father would believe him. "Batman I…" The Dark Knight didn't say a word and just walks away with Nightwing and Red Robin, leaving a crushed Robin behind.

Flashback end

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Damian swallowed the lump in his throat. It had taken a while for him to reach the Manor and he had decided to use the back door mainly to avoid meeting his family members who were definitely disappointed with him even without him saying anything. The Robin couldn't help but release a hollow laugh. His mother ironically had been right all along…they hadn't believed him…they had never love-the thought made Damian choked and he begin to heave as if he was sobbing but there were no tears…he couldn't shed tears…not when he had lost them during his assassin training. The child leaned against the blanket, inhaling the scent of mothballs and softener from the sheets and found himself growing tired. He laughed again… He was so tired…so tired of everything…but he knew that no matter how tired he was…he will never be tired of loving them…even if they never wanted him in the first place…

**To be continued **


	2. Finding out

Can't cry want to cry chapter 2: Finding out

Previously: Damian is injured and his tired mind has finally given up on gaining acceptance from his current family.

Disclaimer: Meme12 does not own Batman and their characters.

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Back in the Bat Cave

"How could you have done that!?" The loud shout made Timothy aka Red Robin stir and the younger boy slowly sits up to find his older brother shouting at his mentor. "It was for the best." "You didn't even asked him or us exactly what happened and then you assumed that it was Damian!?" Bruce ignored his eldest ward who just growled at him. "What's…going on?" "He left Damian out on the freaking streets because he insists that Damian was the one who send Talia and the ninjas on us." Tim's mouth fell open slightly in shock but he recomposes himself. "Batman… Bruce, you must have made a mistake. There is no way Damian would have called Talia to take us out. She left him here." "He wasn't happy." "But now he is. Even if he is still behaving like a brat; Damian is slowly letting us in." "Would he defy his mother?" The cave fell silent at that moment and Dick opens his mouth to say something but in the end seats back down in exasperation while Timothy looks around. "Does Alfred…" "Yeah, he went out of the cave a few hours ago fuming at Bruce which I don't blame him for doing so."

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Manor walls

Alfred elegantly stomped along the Manor walls. The elderly male couldn't help but feel his anger steep as he recalled how callously his own ward had callously abandoned his own son.

_Flashback_

Alfred glanced up when he hears the familiar sound of the Bat mobile arriving in the cave. He stands up and immediately rushes over to help the two unconscious heroes to the Med Bay. "They should be alright Master Bruce." The Bat says nothing but sits himself before the large computer while Alfred cleans the wounds of his two grandchildren when he realises one of them was missing. "Where is Robin? Is he out on external patrol?" The atmosphere changed drastically at the question as Batman remained silent and he continues to type at the giant computer. "Master Bruce, where is Master Damian?" The bat glanced back at his butler who stare promised Bruce that replying him will be the best to avoid any conflict. "I left him there." The butler froze. "Pardon?" "I left him out on the streets since he harmed his older siblings." "Forgive me for being blunt Master Bruce but I cannot see how Master Damian would harm Master Richard and Master Timothy." Blue eyes stared straight at the elderly gentleman. "He may have been bidding for time but his plan has been foiled and now he reaps what he sows." "I'm afraid I find it preposterous that Master Damian has schemed to harm his older sibling whom he has obviously grown to care for them despite their differences when they had first met!" Batman says nothing and continue to type on the computer and Alfred huffed silently. "Master Bruce, was he injured?" The typing continued. "Master Bruce!" "…He will live Alfred." The butler's eyes widen at the same time as Dick stirs and sits up slowly with a groan. "Hey Alfred, got any pain killers? Where's little D?" The elderly butler faced his ward stiffly. "Master Bruce concluded that Master Damian was the one who plotted that attack and left him alone on the streets of Gotham with possible injuries." Dick's mouth dropped open as the elderly butler left leaving the younger male to haggle answers from his mentor/adoptive father.

_Flashback end_

The elderly butler sighs. True, he had his doubts when Bruce had first brought back Damian. The child was too proud for his own good not to mention violent and quick to counter. But as time passed; he could finally see and understand why the child act this way and he could also see improvement in the child's behaviour despite the constant façade of disinterest and his jabbing tongue. Sighing, the butler heads to the kitchen to prepare some soup for Dick and Timothy. Upon reaching the kitchen; he realizes that the extra first aid kit in the kitchen had been taken out and used. Alfred raised a brow and scans the medical kit. Eyes widening in realisation, Alfred immediately made a beeline towards the youngest son's room. He opens the door, revealing a seemingly empty bed room. The elderly male immediately heads to the cupboard and flings the door open. He finds the missing Robin unconscious, leaning against the blankets and clothes; with an arm in a sling and a bandaged head turning red from bleeding. "Master Damian!" The elderly scoops the younger into his arms and tries to rouse the younger Robin but to no avail as the younger was out cold.

Immediately, the elderly butler rushes to the Bat cave while carrying the unconscious Robin interrupting the argument occurring mid-way between the two bats. "Oh my god Damian!" Dick exclaims as the butler lays the small child on the med bed while Tim immediately set to work in checking the injuries. "He has a head wound, possible trauma…needs stiches… The broken arm needs to be set. He has a fever, possible infection." Dick whirls back to stare at his father who remained unfazed at the scene. "Bruce, can't you see…" "Stich him up, we need him awake later." "Bruce…your son is hurt damn it! Can't you see that he put up a fight just for us!? He fought Talia and he got himself hurt for US!" As Dick fought to defend Damian, he was unaware that Tim had completely frozen after shifting the younger Robin on his side after removing the shirt off the younger male. "What…the hell…?"

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**To be continued**

Please read and review this is meme12 saying sayonara matta o!


	3. Coma

**Can't cry want to Cry Chapter 3:** Coma

**Disclaimer:** Meme12 does not own Batman and their characters.

**Warning:** OOC Damian

**Previously:** Alfred finds Damian and rushes the Robin to the Bat Cave for treatment. Tim finds something horribly wrong about the Robin.

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Alfred sighs as he looks over the unconscious 7 year old lying in the bed. A month has passed by since he had found Damian knocked out cold in the cupboard and the younger male had yet to wake up. Tim had stated that it could possibly due to the head trauma Damian had sustained but the butler had suspected it could be more especially after what the family had seen after lifting the shirt of the youngest back. The elderly male tried to rid the tremor caused by the memory of the scars as he gave the child another check over once more before pulling up the blankets and brushing the child's fringe from his face. "Please wake up soon Master Damian…the whole family needs to know that you are alright… They want the answers…even I do…" The butler gazed at the unconscious Robin once more before exiting the room; almost bumping into Dick in the process.

"Oh hey Alfred." "Master Richard, have you gotten some rest?" The younger male chuckled hollowly. "I tried Alfred but…it wasn't really working. I just…kept seeing you know…" The elderly butler sighs with understanding. "I understand, but please do try to get some rest." "Sure thing Alfred, I will check on Tim later after this. He seemed…kinda off after the whole thing…" Alfred's eyes softened, he had recalled how stunned the young teenager was when he saw Damian's back and since then, the male had been more withdrawn locking himself in his room and burying himself in work. "I will check on Master Timothy for you later." Dick wanted to retort but fell silent before flashing Alfred a grateful smile. "Thanks Al." The butler nods and leaves to check on the third youngest of the Wayne family.

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With Timothy

Tim sighs as he drops the book that he had been trying to read for the past hour. The teen's mind could not focus on the contents of the book especially when it is filled with the memories of the scars he sees on the younger male's back. Tim swallows the lump that had built up in his throat. He had a great dislike…no he actually hated Damian to the very core of his being. Well, when you meet someone for the first time and get a knuckle sandwich to the face it was already a bad impression. The impression also worsened when Damian actually tried more attempts to remove him permanently. Tim's patience had literally dwindled down to zero when it came to dealing with Damian and they were constantly butting heads especially since the younger had such an attitude that made Tim wanted to bash his head on the nearest wall just trying to talk to him for a minute. He never could imagine that behind that arrogant façade and attitude that the brat could have such scars…

Tim sighs, he couldn't figure out why he didn't notice it. He is a detective. Nothing could have gotten past his eyes…not even this… Sighing once more, Tim abandons his book and regrets that he had finished all of his assignments and he has nothing left to distract him from the demon spawn's plight. Tim groans as he buried his face in his knees. Half of his mind is chiding him for reacting to such wounds as he had seen worst in his vigilante lifestyle but at the same time he was frighten at the fact that Talia would allow such wounds to be inflicted on someone especially on a child. Tim's morbid thoughts were soon interrupted by a knocking on his room door. "Come in." Alfred enters the room. "I came here to check on you Master Timothy and it seems…you are not too well." Tim sighs. "Alfred I… I've always hated Damian. I mean, he tried to kill me and even when he stopped doing that; he keeps riling me up with insults and I just…" Tim fell silent and rubs his face with a hand while Alfred remains silent.

The silence lasted for a while before it was broken by Alfred. "You are confused Master Timothy and I do not blame you for that…after all Master Damian had been the most…intolerant of your presence and have tried to do you harm on numerous occasions… I had similar thoughts as well that Master Damian was a spoiled brat to be more direct…but in the end he is a child through and through…" Tim looks up to see Alfred's gaze sadden. "He uses his arrogance to hide his loneliness and anger to hide his tears. It is shameful that a butler like me was not able to detect it earlier…" Tim watched as the elderly butler sighs, his shoulders sagging slightly but the older male straightens himself. "Master Damian…had always wanted to be accepted but…he didn't know how and when he did try…one way or another he fails either due to his tongue or other reasons…" "What other reasons?" The elderly butler glanced at his young charge. "…I'm afraid I do not know. Master Damian had always kept silent about everything…school and the Young Justice…" Tim sighs as he rubs his face with a hand. He knew that Damian's reputation among the Young Justice was unwelcome especially since Damian was just too rude for his own good at times even when he didn't mean it.

"He should be doing well in school right…?" Tim thinks as he tries to fight the bad feeling welling up in his gut while Alfred remains silent, thinking about the same thing as his young charge. Both praying hard that Damian will be alright and when he awakens that the light would be shed on to the unspoken questions surrounding the accident that happened and Damian's past.

* * *

With Bruce

"Sir…Sir… Mr Bruce!" The older male was startled out from his thoughts and finds himself facing a very worried annoyed but slightly worried secretary. "What is it?" The woman before him resisted face-palming. "Mr Bruce, I was asking if you would like to shift your meetings today to another day since you are possibly unwell." "What makes you think that way?" The secretary raised a brow. "You haven't been attentive and I have been calling you for the past few minutes. Please forgive my directness sir." The young lady immediately apologises as she recalls how her tone seemed offensive to her boss. Bruce sighs. "It's alright Cindy, I've been too unfocused as you have said…even I have realised it myself…" "Would you like me to shift the meetings to another day?" "That would be great thank you." Cindy nods and leaves the office leaving Bruce to his thoughts. The male sighs and seats back in his chair, his thoughts focused mainly on Damian. The male had no clue on how to solve his son's current situation. The bat within was insisting that it was a hoax with the child cooperating with Talia while the father in him just wanted Damian to wake up and tell him where he had gotten all those scarring on his back. Sighing, Bruce rubs his face with a hand and decides to leave early, knowing that there was no way he could finish his work with the thoughts in his head.

* * *

With Dick

"Hey Dami…the weather is pretty good today you know. Titus is still wondering where you are to take him out on his walks while Alfred the cat is roaming somewhere but she always ends up curling on your bed wondering when you will get up to pet her…" Dick pauses as he stares at his unconscious baby brother's face wishing that his brother would just wake up and scowl at him like he would do when he tries to give him a tackle hug in the morning. "…We…saw the scars on your back… Now I know well you never wanted to wear a swimsuit and why you always want to be the last one to wash up after missions..." Dick lets out a hollow laugh. "And I thought I knew everything about you…what a fool I am…" The older male desperately blinks back tears before continuing. "Well, you really need to wake up because Tim has gone rather withdrawn after he saw your scars. Alfred may seem fine but inside he is just as desperate as us to see you awake once more and Bruce… You don't need to worry about him…he is not mad at you anymore…he's been burying himself in work since it's the only way to keep him sane while he can't do anything about you lying here and me…"

Dick trails off as he gently brushes his youngest brother's hair. "I'm…staying strong but it's getting pretty hard to keep up the smiles for you… I… I just want you to wake up so that our family can be whole again… As whole…as it can possibly be without…Jason…" Dick tries to smile but in the end the dam breaks and he grips the tiny hand. "Please… Please wake up Damian… I need you…the whole family does and we can fix it together bit by bit I promise you… I promise you that…" Dick sobbed and fails to notice the hand he was gripping twitched slightly.

The day went by and Bat family continued with their life as normally as possible but it was evident that there was still tension within the family especially between Bruce and Dick. They had dinner, suited up for patrol and left while Alfred kept watch and cleaned before welcoming the family back. Soon, everyone fell asleep and awoke to another new day. Alfred is the first to awaken and he goes to check on Damian before preparing breakfast. The door swings open and the butler's eyes widens as he sees the small 7 year old sitting up in his bed, staring out of the window.

**To be continued**

Please read and review, this is meme12 saying sayonara matta o!


	4. Silenced

Can't Cry Want to Cry

**Chapter 4:** Silenced

**Previously:** The family is worried about their youngest sons and Damian finally wakes up.

**Warning:** OOC Damian

**Disclaimer:** Meme12 does not own Batman and their characters.

* * *

Alfred enters the room of the youngest Wayne and glances at the tray on the child's bedside table. The older butler's eyes soften in sadness and worry when he realises that the tray of food was once again untouched and Damian was just staring out of the window. "Master Damian, you must eat something…" There was no response and the elder butler approaches the child who continues to stare out of the window without responding to the elderly butler. Alfred kneels down to the child's height and clasp the younger's hand. "Please…Master Damian, tell me what is wrong. Tell me what I can do to ease your pain…" The younger remains silent and Alfred couldn't ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach as Damian remains unresponsive. The butler picks up the tray and exits the room after sparing one last glance at the unresponsive child in the bed.

"He didn't eat again?" Alfred shakes his head in response and Dick sighs. When Damian had regained consciousness, the family was relieved but it was then that they had realised that the youngest didn't speak at all and no matter what Dick or Alfred did, the younger was still unresponsive and was even refusing to eat. Apart from that, Damian would disappear from his room often and wander the Manor halls or the yard at night or in the early morning only to be found by Alfred. Dick sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his fingers. He had tried digging through Damian's stuff but had yet to find anything that could give a clue to Damian's breakdown. In the end, the eldest couldn't help but feel that he had never knew anything about Damian and the younger knew more about him than he knew himself.

"God, I feel so helpless…" "Please don't say that master Richard…perhaps a cup of tea will do you some good. You haven't been sleeping well from looking after master Damian." The younger male opens his mouth to retort before nodding and followed the elderly butler. As soon as both males left, Tim emerged from the shadows. The younger male had been trying to dig up any clues to why Damian is behaving this way but has came up with no leads. "The only place left is…" Tim gulps nervously. He hadn't visited Damian and it was due to the plain fact that he has no clue on how to act around the person who is now a shell of his former self. Tim steels himself as he stares at the door. He had heard about Damian's condition but had yet to truly witness it for himself. Tim inhales then exhales before he knocks on the door. There was no answer and Tim was about to knock again when he remembers that Damian isn't responding to anyone or anything.

Doing an inward face-palm, Tim enters the room. The room was extremely tidy, almost barren with nothing but the 4 poster bed, a desk and a cupboard. "It's almost…like a military barrack in here then a child's bedroom…" Tim thinks to himself before he shakes his head and his eyes are draws to the 7 year old sitting on the bed. The male couldn't help but feel the worry gnaw at the pit of his stomach when he notices that Damian had indeed lost weight after refusing to eat. The child was still staring out of the window and Tim swallows as he approaches. He seats in the chair besides Damian's bed and the child still show no signs of any responsiveness towards his presence. An awkward silence settled in the room and Tim fidgets silently as he tries to find the words to start a conversation with the child that had wanted him dead for so long.

"…Hey, is the weather that nice that you just wanna stare at it all the time…?" Silence met his words and Tim couldn't help but feel the sudden flicker of anger boiling in his gut. "Why…aren't you saying anything… We are not mind readers Damian… We can't read your thoughts and if you want us to help you have to talk to us…!" Silence met his words and something within Timothy snapped as the normally calm and collected Wayne member grabs his brother and shakes him. "Damn it Damian you are worrying everyone just spit out what is worrying…!" Tim's words were stuck in his throat as he saw the normally fierce blue eyes were glazed and dulled, as if all of the life had been sucked out from them. Tim's anger immediately gave way to helplessness as he pulls his younger brother close. "Please…just tell me…what I can do to help you…"

Damian did not respond and Tim sighs knowing that his actions were already futile but he was hoping that his presence could have triggered some form of reaction. Even though he hated admitting it, Damian was still his little brother and he was beginning to miss his spats with Damian no matter how cruel sounding they were. Tim continues to hold Damian for a while when he was startled out of his thoughts by something falling to the floor. The startled male stares in the direction of the commotion and sees Alfred the cat gracefully landing in the mess of papers and books that had toppled from the shelf above Damian's desk.

"Alfred…" The cat stares at Tim before gracefully stepping from the mess and climbs onto Damian's bed, nuzzling Damian's hand with its head. Sighing, Tim pulls away from Damian and goes to clean up the mess. He soon notices that the pages that had spilled on the ground were full of sketches of the Manor residents in their own time. Tim was almost taken away by how realistic the sketches were and he couldn't help but wonder why no one ever knew that Damian had such talent. As he look through each sketch, he could tell that plenty of time and effort where embedded into each sketch. As he picked up the last sketch from the floor, he realised the floorboards below seemed a little irregular.

Riding on instinct, Tim grabs a ruler and slots it into the floorboards and easily lifted the wooden panels. He looks into the hidden space and pulls out a small notebook that was faded and several blotches of what looked like dried blood was splattered on the cover. Instantly, Tim knew he had found something very personal and he had never suspected that Damian would have kept one… He had found Damian's journal. It was at this point which Tim found himself at the crossroads. He was happy that he had found something that could finally connect all of the missing pieces but at the same time he feared what he would find beyond these pages. He glanced once more at Damian who was still unresponsive as Alfred the cat nuzzled his hands and soon came to his decision. "Sorry Damian." He turns back to the journal at hand and flips open the first page.

**To be continued**


	5. Secrets in the dark

**Can't Cry, Want to Cry**

Hey guys Meme12 here, so I know you guys are dying to strangle me something along the lines of 'Damn it woman update!' so which is why I'm updating now…so basically a lot of stuff happen and I just managed to sort them out…but nevertheless I am back so here's the next angst-filled chapter. So please read and review!

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**Chapter 5:** Secrets in the Dark

OCC present in Damian and maybe Tim's character.

**Disclaimer:** Meme12 does not own Batman, Young Justice and Justice League and their characters. (That's a mouthful)

**Previously:** Tim finds Damian's journal and starts reading it.

* * *

_Dear Journal, my name is Damian and you are my first friend. Mother doesn't know about you but I want to keep it that way so that Mother doesn't make you disappear like the others._

Tim froze in mid read as his mind ponders over what Talia would have done but he shakes the thoughts away and continues to read the Journal.

_Mother is always busy; I don't really see her often. She always looks so angry so I asked sister what I should do. She says to give her flowers so I went to get one. Actually sister found it for me but I'm sure it wouldn't hurt. I gave it to mother but she hit me saying I shouldn't do it and that it was weak. She wanted me to tell her who asked me to do this. I told her that it was sister and after that I never saw her again. I really want to make Mother happy but no matter what I did it never worked…and everyone keeps going away… You won't go away right?_

Tim felt his heart sink as the first entry ended in such a way. It was evident from the first time that he met Talia that she was not a perfect mother material. He couldn't help but froze as he realised that Damian's past was almost like his. Nobody to care about him, nobody realizing his existence… The third youngest swallowed to soothe his suddenly dry throat as he continues to flip the pages. Each entry was a paragraph long but nevertheless the contents soon changed and Tim felt his blood froze at the words lining each page as he read deeper.

* * *

With Bruce

"I understand… Yes, as quickly as possible." Bruce hangs up sighing softly to himself just as Alfred appeared with a cup of tea. "Is that Dr Leslie?" "Yes, she can only arrive in another 2 days. Her flight was delayed…" The butler nods and proceeds to serve the tea to his charge as Bruce sigh. "Alfred…" The butler pauses in his serving to properly face the man. "I've screwed it up badly." "Yes you have Master Bruce. A 5 year old would be able to see that as well." The frosty tone in the elderly butler's voice did not go unnoticed by the male and he sighs knowing full well that the tone was only applied when he had done something very wrong. "I didn't know Alfred. Damian had never opened up to me…" "He has tried Master Bruce. Numerous times in fact yet you refuse to acknowledge what the child had accomplished and refuse to put out the patience required to listen." The male sighs in response, rubbing his face with one hand. The room fell into contemplative silence which was soon broken.

"Alfred." The elderly butler stares at his charge. "Do you think I still have a chance...to make this right?" The elderly gentleman remains silent and Bruce felt his heart sank. The male knew fully well that he has screwed up in most ways that he has ever done. He had never bothered to find out more about Damian, always assuming that the child is as scheming as his mother. The child's constant aggression and the way he kept trying to hurt Tim always made him weary of Damian. But Bruce was unaware that by pushing away his own son, he was hurting the boy even more then he had expected. Bruce was so deep in thought that he was startled when Alfred spoke. "Permit me to be frank Master Bruce." "Go ahead Alfred." The elderly butler continues. "Master Damian has been deeply hurt by our actions and I am unsure that even if he ever recovers…he may never be the same spirited child I see despite all of his flaws."Bruce's hand tightens into a fist at those words. "But if there is one thing that child inherited from you is his stubbornness and it is this stubbornness that lets me believe that he will recover but only if we remain by his side and show him that he is still loved. He needs that the most and nothing else…is more important than that…" Bruce looks at Alfred who nods at him with determination. They could not give up now and he will find a way to persuade Damian… To let his youngest know that he is loved. The conviction though was bittersweet for both as it was only realised when the youngest had finally broke.

* * *

Young Justice Headquarters

"Ah peace at last…" "You sound happy." The blond girl states as a green skinned male happily stretched out on the sofa. "Come on! It's great, especially without Robin around." "Isn't that kind of rude ese?" A blue armoured male asks while the male scoffed. "Seriously blue you have to be insane!? I mean Robin only knows how to just mock us and seriously he drives me insane!" "I second that. By Neptune's beard I've never heard anyone complain so much or insult anyone with every line!" Lagan states as he took a bit of his crab cake that Magan made. "Even so, we should try to get along with him. He hasn't spite us much recently hasn't he?" Magan states as she came out of the kitchen with more crab cakes to Lagan's delight. "Well I guess you can say it's pretty peaceful…" "Come on Cassie its great!"

Beast Boy exclaims just as the zeta beam announced a certain speedster arrival and a blur stops right in front of the kitchen. "What's crash today?" "Hey Impulse, Robin isn't here!" The red and white clad hero raised a brow. "Serious but it's like 3 months already?" "Its fine isn't it. He probably is on some secret mission that Batman put him on and soon he will be back bragging about his mission and what's not… Hey what's wrong?" Beast Boy pauses in his words when he notices the way the hyperactive speedster seems to stiffen at the words. "Nothing at all. Oopslookathetimegottarun!" With that, the speedster leaves in a cloud of smoke while the remainder of the team shrugs and resume their chat unaware of Damian's condition.

* * *

Wayne Manor

A thud sound resounded as Damian's journal fell out of Tim's trebling hands. What Damian had gone through was too terrifying to imagine and he couldn't help but wonder how the 7 year old had survived through those years. Tim looks at the journal on the floor. The male couldn't help but feel his anger and hatred grow for Talia for putting her own flesh and blood through those torments. But even more so…he hated himself for judging Damian so much for his actions. He had always assumed Damian was born to be like Talia…Scheming and ruthless… But the greatest detective among the Bat children had forgotten one factor… That Damian was still a child. A child that seek assurance and needed encouragement no matter how arrogant he was… A child that could get hurt no matter how much rage and spite he used as a mask… Tim abruptly stares at Damian, his eyes widening in response to his own stupidity. This child seating in the bed, staring lifelessly out of the window is Damian's true self… A child that had long given up on hope on everything in this world… A child that was exactly like him…

Tim immediately pulls Damian close, unable to hold back the tears from the whirl of emotions from his discovery. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry Damian… It will be ok I promise…" Tim continues to whisper the words while Damian remains emotionless in his arms. The wind blew at the forgotten journal and the pages revealed a picture of a battered and bruised individual falling into a seemingly endless pit.

**To be continued**

* * *

That's all for now folks, this is Meme12 saying sayonara matta o!


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